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Tropical Leaves

“Stillness does not mean the elimination of disturbances as much as a different way of viewing them.”
Mark Epstein, Going to Pieces Without Falling Apart: A Buddhist Perspective on Wholeness


About Me

Gretchen Koenig is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist who earned her Master’s in Clinical Psychology from Chapman University, Orange, and her Bachelor's in Psychology from University of Colorado, Boulder.  She has been in practice for over 20 years, with a focus on individuals, families and couples, and the LGBTQI+ population. Gretchen works with those experiencing family, marital, couples and social relationship issues. She helps clients dealing with mood disorders, anxiety and childhood trauma. And she works with those concerned about their relationship with alcohol/other substances.


Those who are questioning life, their relationship, their identity - such as gender, sexuality, - the future, transitions, or are looking to change your relationship with alcohol/other substances, are encouraged to explore with Gretchen's support. Gretchen joins her clients as partners to find ways to help cope with life's inevitable stress and change. Together, she and clients will explore ways to better flow with the ups and downs in relationships, work and life.


She endeavors to have clients gain courage to explore their authentic self to feel more comfortable and peaceful in life. Ultimately, they will reconnect to the content person that resides within so that the best relationship possible with the world can be achieved. 


For couples, they will work together to enlarge the space of love and understanding between them; allowing for greater concern for the other and respect for the self.​


Specializing in Anxiety, Depression, LGBTQ+, and Couples Therapy


I view anxiety as arising from a threatened loss of self, in many instances rooted in early childhood - though trauma or other negative experiences can certainly result in this loss.  We manage these threats by projecting our worrisome thoughts onto others or situations.  Our coping mechanisms have thus broken down so we withdraw and avoid people, situations, and circumstances.  Anxiety lies to us, telling us not to trust others who love us.

Together we will help you understand your anxiety, learn valuable coping styles, and find contentment within your self and your relationships.


Depression stems from our disappointments and struggles with others and the world around us.  We try over and over to develop and maintain emotionally healthy relationships with ourselves and others.  However, our intense fear of abandonment or losing approval is internalized into feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness and guilt.

To help elevate your mood we will relate present experiences to past hurts, increase insight to make emotions less overwhelming and restore more healthy, uplifting views of self and the world.


One of our basic assumptions is that we each carry an unconscious image of our ideal partner. This image was formed in
childhood. This image powerfully influences the type of partner we select as adults, as well as how we relate to that partner.

While this image carries both the positive AND negative traits of our caregivers, the negative traits carry the most weight in our
attraction to a partner. This is because we unconsciously seek to be healed, to have the needs that were not met in childhood, met.
It would seem logical that we would choose partners who do NOT have the negative characteristics that wounded us; however, it is
these wounds that we want to heal. 

Together we will find the healing characteristics within our partners to bring about joy, love, and trust in the partnership.

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